Space Pipes LLC: Piping the Universe

In order to sustain future human colonies on the Moon, Mars, and beyond, vast amounts of water, food, and air are required. Producing those things on site is technologically impossible, so how do we supply the multi-planetary expansion of the human species?

That’s where Space Pipes LLC comes in. We’ve developed a patented system of “tubes” that connect Earth to whatever celestial body people are populating next.

Each Space Pipe is round, long, and hollow inside, and when they’re connected to each other across the vast reaches of the known Universe, these Pipes (technically “tubes”) allow the transport of goods to human settlements, wherever they are.

Space Pipes is a registered trademark of Space Pipes LLC.

The concept of using “tubes” to ship physical goods through space is something that we invented. Basically we take smaller “tubes” (which are still pretty big!) and connect them to each other, and send objects through.

It’s not like traditional plumbing. Everyone says that it’s just like the plumbing you have in your house, and it’s not. It really isn’t, not when you’re sending things through space. The Space Pipes system is more technologically advanced in ways that are difficult to get into right now.

So you end up with huge “tubes” that all connect with each other, making even longer “tubes,” which we call Space Pipes, and it’s open at both ends. And then you, like, shoot stuff from one side of the Pipe to the other. Across space, from planet to planet.

We haven’t figured out how to actually get the stuff from one end of the pipe to the other. Since most of the trip is in zero-gravity, it shouldn’t take too much energy. It probably depends on how fast you want to get it there.

To be honest, we’re not too worried about the details of that part because we’re, at our core, a “tubes” company. There are logistics companies, and shipping companies, and once we have the Space Pipes Universal Network built, it will be a platform for those and countless other businesses to succeed and profit.

We’re just building the Space Pipes. What goes through them is none of our business.

Space Pipes are an indispensable technology in a multi-planetary future. Every planet that humans travel to besides Earth, all of them will be hooked up to Space Pipes. On one end, at least. The Earth will be at the other end, because that’s where all the air, water, and food comes from.

The expense will not be insignificant. Each individual segment of Space Pipe will have to be built in space, is a half mile in length, and costs $110 million, according to our current estimates. Meaning that with over a half-million Space Pipe segments necessary to connect the Moon, the first node in the Universal Network, the Stage One expenses come to roughly $55 trillion.

This will require the reorientation of the entire planet’s economy, but the economic upsides will be profound. In less than seven generations’ time, the human race can become the first interplanetary species, and reach levels of commerce that are unimaginable today.

The investment opportunities will literally be out of this world and beyond the grasp of mankind. Creating financial markets from nothing. Manifesting consumers out of thin air. All thanks to the power of Space Tubes. You do the math.

Did we mention there are no taxes in Space?